When you get introduced to someone named “Sam” you start striking matches and throwing crumpled tin foil…
You look at the sky at a great sunset or cloud formation and find yourself marveling at the rendering technique.
You hear but can’t see a plane on a hazy day and you wish you could just turn labels on.
My brother once called me to inform me about a mobile radar-based traffic enforcement system on my way home from work.
His call basically was “Mudspike, B10, be careful”.
My wife just rolled her eyes.
And when my wife breastfed my daughter I said stuff like “cleared contact”, and “contact, taking fuel”
My wife rolled her eyes.
I also made a baby bib that had the symbol on it which planes have near their air refueling receptacle, pointing at the mouth. I said that helps me refuel the baby.
My wife rolled her eyes.
We are about 3 miles SW from RWY 2L threshold at KPDK and therefore get a lot of corporate traffic over our backyard. Lots of PC-12s, King Airs, and Citations. I tend to look up, shake my fist, and curse the lucky ■■■■■■■ whom is making a living doing what he loves. I know that it’s a hard road to a decent income, but far better than chained to a desk like the other 98% of us.
You asked for it. 
when you seat at the desk in your ofice, looking out the window and you know you should be flying out and up there.
[insert Leonardo’s quote here]
You just wish to stand up, go to your boss and give him your resignation.
…true story !
You call the AWOS for weather even when your not flying 
You’ve asked a mechanic at the shop if you can MEL something on your car.
This actually happened to me last night. It may sound crazy but it really happened.
I’ve got an Saitek X-52…or is it an X-52 Pro? I got it on eBay and don’t remember what the add said.
Last night I dreamed I was trying to figure out what X-52 I had and what the differences were…I was hearing voices giving me advice, what to look for, what different lights meant, etc.
I’m thinking the “voices” was me internalizing comments from a Mudspike forum…regardless…in the dream I never did figure things out…so maybe it was the DCS forum not the Mudspike forum?…no, the people were friendly…definitely Mudspike. 
BTW, does anybody know the difference between an X-52 and the X-52 Pro? Seriously. I don’t want another night like that. 
Reminded me of some quotes from Dart while he was getting his pilots license.
The graphics of the Real World could use an upgrade. While the cockpits were rendered beautifully, my first flight was set to Summer Haze, reducing the draw distance considerably, desaturating colors, and was generally disappointing in appearance. Objects on the ground tended to “pop up” in clearings of the forest as we approached; in fact the Shelby County Airport itself did this, suddenly appearing as we approached from the west. Today was much better since we had some wind to make things crystal clear and the vibrant greens and browns came out, but the light scattered clouds had an obvious repetitive shape, especially a low layer that looked like the teeth of a saw blade pointed upwards.
Draw distance for other aircraft needs to be improved. While I spotted a helicopter at five miles, it started out as a small black dot above the horizon and was very slow to resolve to a recognizable shape. A white Citation was invisible to both the instructor and me even though we were told where it was until less than a quarter mile away — and it was only 1000 feet lower than us! Something is screwy when you can’t see a white plane over green forests at one o’clock in the afternoon in clear skies.
Flight Modeling is suspect in the Cessna and control response likely wrong in CTLS. To be blunt, the Cessna 172 flies like it is on rails! Just about everything is under done, from adverse yaw to entering and exiting turns. In the CTLS, the elevator response to control input is exaggerated; one need only apply the slightest back pressure to induce noticeable pitch either way, and there is no menu to adjust input curves. While it is much livelier than the Cessna, it remains in many ways much easier to control and keep flying than anything in a combat flight simulation.
Flight Sim to Flight Line: http://www.simhq.com/_air13/air_451a.html
Wheels
Believe me, I know how lucky I am. When I left the RAF, I got a job doing IT Tech Support which was miserable. I used to sit at my desk and watch the clock from 9am to 5pm. I did that for 3 years.
I can see it clearly.
Keep teling me about it 
Three more months and we can shake hands.
…true story ! 
I’ve been doing it since 1995. I stopped briefly for most of 2012 and 2013 when I was unemployed.
Been doing it ever since.
I’m hovering at that null point between a complete life change into full time flying and being stuck being a lorry driver until I expire…
I can’t afford to do the flying full time yet so I’m working nights on the trucks and studying and flying during the day. I’m getting there but this last year has been a… Challenge… Lorry driving is not exactly known for its short hours and easy days so it’s difficult to cope sometimes. I’m getting there though and I’m well over halfway to being a full time aviator but the tunnel seems very deep sometimes.
But when I go off that runway and look over my shoulder at the ground disappearing after being awake for 22 hours I do feel very privileged to be able to do this.
Not nearly as much time as @JediMaster, but did it for 6 years. Quit after the last time two bosses told me – in writing – I needed to learn to hear better. Now I’m doing eff all but learning to draw and refining the various novels I’ve written since 2015. If I have to get another job, just going to be a janitor or something, because I’m fed up with IT people telling me I need to learn to hear better!
On topic: When you’re driving in the car and you don’t want to use brakes for fear of shimmy or sliding off the runway, so you just wait for wheel friction to slow you down.
That is horrendous @franze so sorry to hear you had to go through that. Some people just make this planet a really sucky place to exist
I can only imagine. I once came across a USAF 1Lt who worked for me, on the phone breathing IT support because his computer wouldn’t come on…I listened for a few seconds, then bent down, picked up the computer’s unplugged power cord from the floor, right next to the 1Lt’s foot, and showed it to the young officer…who then mumbled something like “never mind” and hung up.
No, he offered no apologies to IT Tech support. (sigh)
The guy was an F-15 driver…which is a bit scary now that I think about it.
I could only add repetions of the same, really.
When you think you have done a good job of keeping aviation jargon out of family life, but the kid mysteriously knows how to convert the car’s speed from kmh to knots, says “clear right” or “stop” at intersections when you ask her to double check for you, looks up the weather for her friends’ holiday spots with METARs online, and knows which runway at Quito would be in use by looking at the trees. Then there is her and my own mother, who when I arrive in Viru Viru ask why the dogleg abeam Piura, or if we had an inop pack because of the lower than normal enroute FL.
And they all call flights “operations”. LOL!
Actually they do when using a GPU… regardless, when nothing happened when he engaged the On/Off switch, one would have thought a trained pilot’s “checklist” mentality would have gone right to “Check power plug”…not “Continue to kick unattached power plug with foot while calling IT Support.”
I guess that’s the feeling I got when I had to show the pilot how to operate the external canopy lever.
”They let you fly this beast, but you need the help of a conscript crew chief to open the canopy?”
In his defense, we always had the jet prepped and ready, with the canopy open, when the jockeys arrived. They usually never had to open it, themselves.
You know you’re a pilot when…
…you know the best place to eat within 5 miles of 50 airports…
Happens often, and did this morning when pulling the Odyssey into the carpool lane at school. Dropping off the kids, we frequently are running behind and arrive with our hair on fire. I have two 5 year olds and 1 eight. As we turn the corner and clear the crossing guard, I yell, “Stand up!” In place of “Hook up” comes “Backpacks on!” Then “Shuffle to the door!”
Then, “Go, go, go!” as they bail out the door.
