No need HB…I didn’t take any offence. 
I thought about that, not sure I can make it work. Having said that, it could be that I just need to reprogram my muscle memory as I’m fine with the farm JCB and left handed stick.
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Urgh! I hate the jcb backhoe pattern controls
Give me ISO controls any day up down left amd right. None of that diagonal nonsense 
On the newer ones, you can switch to iso and that to me says diagonal was a bad plan lol
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ok, Checked out with the 360 pad for you @keets
i had to turn the turret sensitivity down, its hectic as standard. also moved the lase button to X instead of the DPad up it was originally, however this does mean you have to take off your finger while aiming so i may move it to the stick itself. other than that, its actually alright as standard. movement certainly easier
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Could the laser be one of the shoulder buttons? You wouldn’t be lasing and firing at the same time anyway, right?
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I don’t want to overdo these otherwise I will soon run out of tank warries for you, at least ones that aren’t NSFW. So because this might be the last one for a while I will make it a long(ish) one…
I have mentioned elsewhere that over the course of my Army/Defence Civilian career I have been priviliged to work alongside various Special Forces and other elite soldiers and units.
The first time was in 1989 or 90 with the Gurkhas. Every two or three years the Anti-Tank teams from the Gurkha Bn stationed in Hong Kong (it was still a British territory at the time) would bring their Milan’s out to Puckapunyal, home of 1st Armd Regt.
This gave them the opportunity to practice their tactics against actual tanks and to live fire, thankfully not at the same time 
The exercise ran over two weeks and was generally unscripted. Our tasks were typical Tank Ops, their task: Find us and kill us.
You may have heard that Gurkhas are tough? Believe me they are. They spent two solid weeks man-packing their Milans and firing posts and constantly chasing us all over the range… I mean constantly, I don’t think I ever got as little sleep on exercise as I did then. Puckapunyal (Pucka) range isn’t huge, about 20km x 20km, but that is nearly 400 square KM and a lot of ground to cover on foot!
There were a couple of pauses during the ex where we got to show them over the Leopards and explain our tactics and they did the same - A Milan ATGM was the first time I ever looked through a thermal sight. These ‘dog and pony shows’ were mainly the Brit Officers talking because most of the Gurkhas spoke very little English and we spoke zero Nepalese. Communication with them consisted primarily of lots of hand gestures.
The Ex concluded with a Milan live fire demo. And that was absolutely surreal. It had been raining for most of the Ex and we (us and the Gurkhas) were covered in mud and filthy.
Meanwhile, less than 20m-30m behind the firing point on a small hill was a pristine white marquee with tables, white linen, silverware, stewards, the works. Standing under the marquee, sipping sherry and eating canapes; all the Officers in their formal mess dress! One of the Brits was heard to say after the firing had concluded “Jolly good show, wot.”
That evening there was a BBQ (an end-Ex tradition, along with ‘two cans, per man, perhaps’) in the transit lines that the Gurkhas were accomodated in just across the road from the Regiment.
Each Gurkha had brought a couple of spare kukri’s that they were selling. $25 (a tidy sum for a soldier back then) and that was non-negotiable. Guys were offering all sorts of kit in exchange; slouch hats, tank suits, etc, but every offer was met with a shake of the head and one of the few english words they all knew “no”.
About this time, young Trooper Bumcrack had a bit of a eureka moment. Thinking back to the Ex with it ■■■■■■■ down with rain and these guys having to hump everything (meaning size and weight was an issue) he realised he had a spare ‘smock psychological’ in his trunk.
Racing back to my room, retrieving said item and back to the BBQ was probably the fastest I had run since recruit training.
I walked up to the closest Gurkha with a kukri for sale, with a smock psychological in hand (and 25 bucks in my pocket as a back-up, I really wanted a kukri) and showed him this:
I finally managed to convey that I wanted to swap it for a kukri, only to get a shake of the head and “No, 25 dollar”
Until I undid the button and with a couple of quick shakes, and voila!
OMG, a near riot broke out as about a dozen Gurkas started ‘jostling’ with each other to be the first to get their kukri into my hand and grab the jacket 
Just about every other Trooper who hadn’t already bought a kukri disappeared and returned with a smock psychological. Even if it wasn’t a spare they would just fill out the L&D and cop the $5 pay deduction for its replacement.
While the ‘Smock-Waterproof-Camouflage’ might weigh next to nothing and will fold up into its own breast pocket, it earned the nickname because while it was waterproof, it was 100% waterproof (plastic) which means it didn’t breathe and with any physical exertion you would sweat like a pig and within 30 minutes be just as wet if you weren’t wearing it at all (i.e. the belief it would keep you dry was all in your head).
So that is the story of how I got a genuine kukri from a Gurkha. But it isn’t quite the end of the story…
Gurkhas are not only tough, they have a well deserved fearsome reputation. As soon as I had that kukri in hand, I high-tailed it out of there before he decided to try it on and realise that he was on the losing end of a crap deal.
To this day I live in dread that somewhere out there is a Gurkha sharpening another kukri, just for me!
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Smock, psychological, is the funniest thing I’ve heard all day.
I did a Talisman Saber a few years back. My English has never been the same.
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On behalf of the ADF, I apologise
How many hoop snakes or drop bears did you see while you were out here 
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The opposite. My repertoire of colloquial metaphor was vastly enhanced, haha. One of my counterparts, every time he would get frustrated at someone wasting time, or going too deep into details, would exclaim, “We’re not here to f*** spiders, mate.”
And I’ve proudly kept my FRED in my kit ever since.
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Being out at out training academy for so long, I managed to convince several cadet classes that the reason we had a mold problem in one of our buildings before it was renovated was because of the closed underground swimming pool located underneath. A couple of the cadet side instructors who were quick on the uptake backed my story when cold asked about it, and it became a bit of a mythos. On the first day the cadets were told in no uncertain terms to “NEVER descend down that stairway underneath the hatch” under peril of termination. When we had them up on the field/driving track, which has all manner of bits of old draining and irrigation piping stick out in very odd places, they always need to stay clear of the “chlorine canister emergency vent” or avoid kicking the “pump over pressure relief valve housing enclosure.” The big depression in the front parking area grass was due “to the settling of the roof above the pool”, which of course was the reason we couldn’t use the pool, and it was unsafe for them to even go take a look at it.
Good times.
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AKA: F-king Ridiculous Eating Device and I not only have one in the cutlery drawer, but another in my Rural Fire Service ‘go bag’.
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I love that kind of stuff. I’ve started several lasting rumors like that. Once they take on a life of their own they become gospel truth!
ETA: The best rumors are always started by implication- then no one remembers where it came from. Years later you randomly overheat some junior personnel telling another “of course that’s what it’s done this way, everyone knows X happened!”
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I once had to explain to a US Army soldier, after he overheard a mate and I call each other F*wit and dickhead, that ‘no we don’t hate each other, we are in fact best mates’.
And further explain that when an Aussie is using such terms of endearment or taking the ■■■■/mickey it means they like you. It is when they are ‘overly polite’ it generally means that they do in fact think you are a F*wit or dickhead
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Man, that is gold.
Brecon has a close link with the Gurkhas, having been based in Brecon for 40 years or so.
I live close to the army range and drive over it regularly to the petrol station. One day I was filling up and there was quite a few Gurkhas about in battle dress. As I went to pay, I realised they were there stocking up on sweets before spending a rain sodden night. I have never seen anyone buy so many Haribo’s and full fat Coca Cola. They were all buying armfuls.
As I got back into the car, they were outside stuffing their faces with big grins. All I could think of was a tiny Gurkha (they are small), with that amount of sugar in him = Duracell Bunny. 
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You know, I never could tell if they were happy or imagining how your head would look as a trophy?
Of all the soldiers I have ‘worked’ with over the years, the one’s I would least like to be on the other side are Gurkhas. The thought of them all hyped up on a sugar rush gives me shivers
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After listening to parts of the above, I decided to give the game another go and it is kicking my arse! What scenarios are “easy” except the tank range? The mouse aiming does not work for me 
I’m supposed to be a deadly force of nature spreading death and destruction, but by the time I get the gun laid, at least six rounds have come my way.
Imma rig up an xbox controller. Seeing upthread how a real gunners’ controls look, its more realistic than a mouse.
And how in hades am I supposed to see things before I take sabot to the lower front plate? Frustrated but intrigued. I used to love M1TP2 and I want to learn and like this thing.
Are the AI meant to be this stupid? I am trying to run “silver bullet”, where the scenario tells me I’ll be engaging a recon position. It turns out to be multiple T tanks and support. I die. My wingman dies. I looked at him, he was parked cresting the hill side on. He deserved his fate.
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It did take me a little while to get used to the mouse aim … I even tried setting the controls to my flight stick (the same way I play steel beasts) … but the problem is the palm switch which you need to hold down to move the gun … so went back to the mouse and keyboard
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I will say, the AI on teammates isnt the best. They do die.
Ive started using the Xbox controller as well. Its not perfect but after trying it out to help @keets i decided to keep with it (plus obi likes it 
)
You really have to use the teammate commands to get them moving around and into cover. Its a bit of a crap shoot.
Some missions are absolutely incredibly difficult.
There is one in particular that ive yet to complete. 2x m1 vs what feels like an entire bridage rolling down a hill. Its intensely difficult
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That sounds like the one I’m breaking my head on. I’ll try a different one.
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